Sunday, March 29, 2009

Nice Long Weekend.

Current song: Sad But True by Metallica

After a very long, stressful, emotional, hectic week I had to crash, and did. Friday at lunch I checked with a friend to see if a movie could be in the works, but said friend was going to be busy. Probably just as well because by three o'clock I was dragging--HARD--and would probably have canceled. So I schlepped my tired tuchus home and deposited myself on the sofa where I remained until bed. The next day (Saturday)I woke up late to a nice steady rain. It had been raining here since Wednesday so my closet was nicely watered, too.

Saturday was kinda weird. My eyes were being really sensitive, especially when I stepped outside (odd considering the sky was very dark), so I spent most of the day on the sofa which the blinds shut tight.

*Ok, now that I've pontificated (NERD ALERT NERD ALERT) about it it's not so strange, the only light that was getting through the clouds was the UV stuff which really mucks with your eyes.*

The kid in my was thrilled to find that even though FoxSports was NOT following their schedule and airing tennis (for the second day in a row, way-to-go schmucks) Disney was airing some all time classic: Tarzan, Hercules, Aladin, and then Mulan. However, because of aforementioned eye sensitiveness I found myself falling asleep for twenty-five to thirty minutes at a stretch, which totally threw my body clock off. So, about ten o'clock I found a wave of energy and could not fall asleep until around three. Gotta love Bette Davis' ability to put you to sleep, LOL.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Shameless Self-plug

For anyone who's interested I'm slowly detailing my experiences in Armenia during December 2007 in the following blog:

Some explanations.

Current song: the Right Na Na Na Na Na Na song by Akon.

I guess I could explain where the title of my blog comes from. It is a line from the song, "Sometimes it's a Bitch" by Stevie Nicks. I don't remember who wrote it, but when I first heard it I thought to myself, hmm, sounds right. So that has been my theme song du jour (they can change so often) for a good while now. Maybe I shouldn't say theme song du jour until it begins to change regularly again?

Well I've run through rainbows and castles of candy

I cried a river of tears from the pain

I try to dance with what life has to hand me

My partner's been partner's been pain

There are days when I swear I could fly like an eagle

And dark desperate hours that nobody sees

My arms stretched triumphant on top of the mountain

My head in my hands...down on my knees

Sometimes it's a bitch...sometimes it's a breeze

Sometimes love's blind...and sometimes it sees

Sometimes it's roses...and, sometimes it's weeds

Sometimes it's a bitch...sometimes it's a breeze

I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure

I've laid down with love and I woke up with lies

What's it all worth only the heart can measure

It's not what's in the mirror...but what's left inside

Sometimes it's a bitch...sometimes it's a breeze

Sometimes love's blind...and sometimes it sees

Sometimes it's roses...and, sometimes it's weeds

Sometimes it's a bitch...sometimes it's a breeze

You gotta take it as it comes

Sometimes it don't come easy

I've run through rainbows and castles of candy

And I've cried a river of tears from the pain

I tried to dance with what life had to hand me

And if I could...I'd do it all over again

Sometimes it's a bitch...sometimes it's a breeze

Sometimes love's blind...and sometimes it sees

Sometimes it's roses...and, sometimes it's weeds

Sometimes it's a bitch...sometimes it's a breeze

Sometimes the picture just ain't what it seems

You get what you want...but it's not what you need

Sometimes it's a's a breeze

Well it's a's a's a breeze...

Yesterday was a "bitch" day -- Granddaddy's funeral. I didn't really get emotional until they asked if I would sing. I was given the choice of "How Great Thou Art" and "Amazing Grace." I chose "Amazing Grace" because "HGTA" has a LOT of high and long notes and it would be a stretch if I could hit half of them because:

1. I haven't sang like that in several years. Karaoke and/or shower does not equal wedding/funeral/choir.

2. My throat was tightening up just thinking about it (I think this was the main reason)

So I chose AG. Is it wrong that I enjoyed singing "Smackwater Jack" after practicing AG a few times a lot more (my dad was going to accompany me)?

Anyway, the funeral was a roller coaster of emotions. I myself didn't really get emotional until I was actually there. My mom was good one minute and then not the next. My cousin was far more emotional than I expected, and Grandmama was pretty much rock solid. I couldn't, however, throw dirt on the casket, I just couldn't.

Monday, March 23, 2009

An auspicious begining.

Ok, I'm starting a blog for several reasons:

1. I have a least three independent thoughts/ideas and a song floating around in my head at any given time. Song of the moment "Circus" by Britney Spears. Don't hate. I would like to be able to have a better record of some of the day to day experiences that I have, because every day is different.

2. I've kept blogs from time to time documenting various experiences. My two biggest and best (greatest hits?) were of the time I spent living in Germany and Armenia (two separate occassions). Unfortunately due to the superior craftsmanship of the people at Microsoft (please note the dripping sarcasm) the Windows XP operating system on my last computer decided to digest itself into silicon oblivion. Lucky me, eh? Somewhere I have a saved email file so I may pull that up and post a link to it, we'll see how that goes.

3. And probably the most definitive reason why I'm actually starting this, is because I'm sitting at work waiting for things to boil/distill and I just found out my grandfather passed away.

So, let's begin with another list (I like lists, FYI) of a few premises about this blog.

1. I'm completely random and my thoughts don't always flow in a linear fashion.

2. If I refer to a person I will almost always use an alias, though if you know me you should at least be able to identify yourself as well as maybe a few others, it just depends on how much our circles intertwine. You should know that the terms are always terms of affection, regardless of how mean they may appear, haha.

3. If I've identified your blog in here and you don't know me, I promise you I'm not a stalker (visions of Bill Clinton saying "I did not have sexual relations with that woman" are coming to mind, eh?), I just simply enjoy reading your blog and if I've gone through the trouble of following it and posting it, take the gesture as you have made me smile. If you want to hear the tale of how I found your blog, feel free to ask me. How's that?

4. I reserve the right to contradict myself.

Ok, onto today's business. It's almost 20:00. I'm still at work, trying to light a fire under a validation process that doesn't want to speed itself up. Musn't hurry these things you know.

My dad called around 16:30. At that precise moment I had my phone in my hand changing songs. My first thought was, Jeez Dad couldn't you wait thirty minutes before calling. You know I usually don't get off till five. I supressed the urge to sound aggrivated on the phone, turns out with good reason. Apparently Granddaddy had passed away that morning. This was very unexpected as he had no serious health issues. Ok, the man was 82 and had been in and out of the hospital numerous times, but never for anything life threatening. Grandmama came home from church and found him slumped over the dresser, so nobody really knows what happened, or when. I haven't felt anything yet, perhaps because I haven't had time to digest it all. Maybe also because the last time someone this close passed away was almost eight years ago, when I was 15. Anyway, Nasty, Skinny, and Quality at work were very sympathetic, and offered to help in any way they could. What else were they to say, but they seemed full of genuine concern which means more to me than the actual offers (which doesn't mean I still don't appreciate the offers). Nasty and AD were in the lab with me when the phone call came through so I'm sure my facial expressions were something to behold as I was filled in on the events.

Ok, that being said, the funeral is in two days in Small Georgia Mountain Town. While all that sounds great, bear in mind there is no easy way to get to Small Georgia Mountain Town from Hartwell, where I live or Gwinnett County where the rents live. This of course means at least two hours of winding through little country roads behind people whose concept of "fast" is 40mph. Oh goody. Unfortunately, aforementioned validation means that I won't be able to attend the viewing. This is my call, not Skinny's or Quality's.

*BTW, side note, I really wish I could have been wage these next two days at it's approaching 20:30, haha.*

*Another side note, I don't normally do this at work, however, everything I'm doing at the moment consists of ten minutes of waiting, and thirty seconds of work!*

To change the subject, things at work are going well, I really can't complain much. I still don't feel very comfortable with many of the people at work, which is unfortunate considering I think work should be as pleasant as possible. On one hand I understand I'm an outsider here (city/suburb boy with a host of interests and experiences not to be found in most people around here) who apparently comes across as stuck up and arrogant. Thankfully most of the people I work with day-in and day-out I get along with fine. On the other the whole everybody-be-involved-and-know-everything-about-you-and-then-gossip-and-make-judgments-about-it is a real put off. I have yet to strike a happy medium.

I do, however, get along quite well with the people I do work on a day-to-day basis. Perhaps it's because the group of people I work with all went to college, while the large majority of people I don't work with did. I'm told it's a matter of perspective. Guess it's hard for me to have that perspective since I've never been in that position. Go figure.