Patient QOTD

"I am mad at the fish. It doesn't want me to eat it."

...how much can on really say about that.

Lost all dignity...

So, that song What Makes You Beautiful, I've totally been jamming to it when I hear it on the radio. Today, I learned that it is sung by a group of British boys...none of whom is over the age of twenty. I have lost all my dignity. And I still like the song...sadly. AND, I am that lame, I looked up the song live, and to their credit, they at least sang the stupid thing live. There is no hope for me. That is all.

In other news, I finished my Renal/Nephrology elective today. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming. 

Oh What a Day!

What.A.Day indeed! Today (technically now yesterday) was planted by a seed on Friday afternoon, at 5:01 EST. The registrar's office of my school sent out an email notifying students that the electives available after September (that's in about three months...) would finally be available to book beginning the following Monday. How kind of them to send that out after the office closed at 5pm, for the weekend.

Fast forward to Monday. Every senior student has of course read that email, and is ready to jump the phone lines first thing that morning, including yours truly. I needed three, three, measly little electives and I would be done. I just wanted (granted only wanted, not needed) them to be in Chicago so I wouldn't have to pick up my life any sooner than necessary. One of the many reasons I moved to Chicago in the first place was to avoid doing just that. I wanted to stay in one place for monetary, personal, and stress reasons. So I start dialing. The first three times I'm told the circuits are busy. After that I perused through my emails and found a different number, and back doored my way into the holding queue. I was intercepted by student services, who suggested I leave a message, but I firmly maintained that I wanted to be in the queue. By the time my message was answered and my email request received everything would have been taken. So I waited. I waited a total of NINETY minutes, before I finally spoke with an advisor. In three minutes my schedule was set. I'll recap that for you; I waited ninety minutes to spend three doing my business. I got my last three electives, in Chicago. Woot. It looks something like this.

Early Monday morning I decided that I would be late and just accept having to rush through my notes before rounding in order to get my stuff done, so I left about an hour later than I normally do for rounds. On top of that, my partner, for the fourth day in a row, notified me mere minutes before rounding was scheduled to begin that he was unable to come. His reasons have varied by the day, and apparently it reached a head such that the medical education director called him and said unless he was in the Emergency Room he was not too sick to come in. I honestly could not care whether he showed up or not. I just did not appreciate, repeatedly, not being informed of it until it was too late for me to do anything about it, so half the patients didn't get rounded on until the physician arrived--which is bad. Usually I finish rounding forty-five minutes to an hour before the doctor arrives, and I spend that time either studying, reading the news, or gabbing with my fellow students about God-knows-what. However, I could also be using that time to see more patients.

WTF Mate...

While burning through a chapter of Harrison's in order to make a presentation in as little time as possible (it corresponds almost exactly with the amount of notice I was given to actually prepare it...) I came across this little gem...
Estimated GFR (mL/min per 1.73 m2) = 1.86 x (PCr)^1.154 x (age)^0.203...What schmo came up with this equation??? And why did Harrison even bother to include it in his text book...I don't know about you but I do not carry around a Ti-80something capable of doing exponents just to calculate GFR...esoteric knowledge Mr. Harrison!!!

Welcome to My World

“Critics are our friends, they show us our faults.” ~ Benjamin Franklin
...I must have a lot of friends. Many of them my attendings.

Renal Exam in a Nutshell

"Hi how ya doing. You're peeing? Awesome. Ok I'm gonna go sort through your 14000 lab results now. Maybe I'll figure out how to tell my attending why your 0.1 drop in magnesium is significant.  TTYL."

Best patient of the day..

"I need clothes to cover up my body!!"

*lifts up gown showing us all the goodies*

Patient has a sitter and a football helmet.